Before tour: the master suite

Welcome to the master suite (boom-chicka-wah-wah).

At nearly 23 feet long and 16 feet wide, the master is one of the largest spaces in the house, but it feels much smaller due to an awkward layout that forces the bed into a corner that measures only 8 by 10. The bathroom and closet occupy the southeast corner of the room, creating an L-shaped space that’s difficult to furnish efficiently. The long leg of the L is too wide to be a hallway, but too narrow to be home to anything other than a dresser. Louis uses this area to work through spastic bouts of puppy energy while we’re in the bathroom.

At some point, the master suite was cobbled together from two smaller bedrooms, which explains its size, uncommon in houses of this vintage. The north end of the room is pleasantly daylit, with large windows on three sides. Unfortunately, this feature can work contrary to the goal of restful sleep, particularly when you have a puppy that’s ready to rock and roll at the faintest glimmer of dawn. A shutter order is in the works.

The closet is cavernous, but its square shape makes it difficult to take advantage of the large volume. Buried in the wall behind the closet is a chimney, which I’ll expose to the room one day, perhaps throwing our house’s nickname, Seven Hearths, off by one.

If any room in the house could rightfully be labeled “updated”, the master bath is it.  A new-ish vanity and shower insert and a brand-new toilet keep bath time a notch above disgusting. Though unattractive, the linoleum floors are durable and easy to clean.

The ceilings throughout the room are Celotex tiles over beautiful beadboard planks (shaking fist at all those who foist the “easy fix” on unknowing and frustrated homeowners). The walls are drywall, though there’s evidence to suggest there’s beadboard below that as well. The floors are narrow heart pine boards that are pitted, gouged and stained in ways that make you wonder if the room was once the site of a UFC cage match.

Though there are no immediate plans to renovate the master suite, we can’t wait until we’re able to. As our friends and relatives can attest, Weezie and I keep geriatric hours and consider 10:30 p.m. the middle of the night. Any improvements to our nightly domain will be greatly appreciated, if only through closed eyelids.